Last night, I couldn't sleep. When I can't sleep, I turn on the TV and it usually puts me to sleep. And once I feel that coming on, I turn on the sleep timer and allow myself to dose off. That didn't work last night, so I did some channel surfing and found myself being sucked into some truly ridiculously bad TV shows. When I say sucked in, I don't mean guilty pleasure, I mean I was just amazed at how completely vapid these people were. Not a shred of self-respect or respect for anyone else. Nothing but star-fuckers and celebrity side-kicks mugging for more camera time.
Some may think I'm speaking out of turn because I can honestly say I have never seen an entire episode of any of "The Real Housewives of...." shows. How can anyone sit through these? These women are not real housewives. They are not real women, hell they barely pass for real people. They are over-botoxed, tummy-tucked, divas who have never worked a day in their lives, but lucked out and married some rich sucker. In the few scenes I've watched, these women surround themselves with women as deplorable as themselves. They do not have friends, just other bitchy women who are only in it for the camera time and the money. That'shows you that in some cases money cannot buy happiness. Can anyone that shallow be happy? Or are they too stupid to know they are walking caricatures? They create drama from nothing and are constantly tearing one another apart. The word "bitch" is tossed around like its a term of endearment. And to make matters worse, these women bring their children into the fold as well. It makes me sick that people would sell out their families like this just to get on camera and make some cash. The absolute worst part? The ratings are through the roof.
Then there's "16 and Pregnant" on MTV. Wow. This show actually leaves me speechless. In a day and age where grown adults in committed gay relationships are not allowed to marry, we let these teenagers pop out kids like cakes from an Easy Bake Oven. And to make matters worse, every one of the fathers is a douche bag to the furthest extent. And these young girls try to work so hard to make these "relationships" work. You're 16 fucking years old! Kick that douche bag out of your life and give that kid up for adoption. You fucked up your life, the least you could do is give that poor kid a decent shot in life. And what's with all the teenage mothers smoking around their babies?? Why aren't there more laws to protect these poor children. MTV should be ashamed of itself for airing this kind of disgusting crap. These poor girls don't deserve airtime or a TV show. They need to be sent away and educated. They need chastity belts and birth control pills. If these boys won't wear condoms then tie their fucking tubes! We have to stop bringing these children into the world under such dire and unsurvivable circumstances. And MTV needs to stop airing this show. By season two, girls were getting pregnant to get on the show. It makes my skin crawl.
Now we'll move onto the show about the Playboy Bunny Holly. No, I don't actually know the title of this show. For one, she looks remarkably like Gwen Stefani obviously minus the class. She has no discernible talent besides being able to pose naked and star in "Peep Show." Cameras follow her around and try to make her seem even remotely interesting. However, she actually comes off as a sweet, if not somewhat dumb girl. And its TV, so the dumb part could all be an act. Heck, the nice part could be too. She's not the bad part of the show though, it's her three assistants. Two women and one guy (who is gayer than gay-he makes Perez Hilton look like a UFC fighter). They are bitchy, rude, self-absorbed star-fuckers. They mug for the camera, they try to out-drama each other, they scream, they cry and throw fits. They make Paris Hilton look like a friggin' débutante. They scream and fight over whose a better friend to Holly. Seriously?? Then they make up and praise each other and then talk about what good people they are. You are not good, you are vapid and deplorable and you should be ashamed of yourself for acting that way on television. Not to mention the amount of alcohol they drink. And this is just what's been edited down for 30 minutes. They traipse all over Vegas living the VIP life and doing absolutely nothing to deserve the VIP treatment. These shows make me so happy I don't live in a place like LA or Vegas.
Why did we give Kate another show after the Jon and Kate show destroyed their marriage? Kate has shown herself to be mean, rude and a bad mother. Yet we made him the villain and gave her another TV show. Don't get me wrong, I think he's the king of douche bags in Ed Hardy clothes, but why we have made her into some victim is beyond me. God help those eight children being exploited to further their parents careers. What exactly do these people do? How would they support these eight kids if they weren't on TV? What the fuck were they thinking having eight children when they are clearly unable to even take care of themselves? It just makes me sick.
Yeah, I'm up on a soapbox again, but c'mon. I don't think I'm better than any of these people, just VERY different. Wait, you know what? I am better than these people because I have self-respect and I know how to keep my private life private. I also won't sell my family or friends up the river for some camera time or to make a buck. Seriously, where will these people be in 5 years? You won't know their names or even remember who they were. Some people claim this stuff is their guilty pleasure. I think its sad that people take pleasure in watching these people exploit themselves, their families and their children just to get their 15 minutes of fame.
Andy Warhol is probably rolling around in his grave watching how people have turned his "15 Minutes of Fame" idea into such a deplorable way of life. I miss life when I was a teenager where every celebrity didn't have a camera in their crotch 24 hours a day. Really, how much further can this go? When will it stop? It won't stop until we stop watching. So stop watching already.